Insomnia

What can I be passionate about during the hours when no one and no thing is awake?

I've been awake since 2AM, thinking a lot about the creative process. Thinking about Louise Bourgeouis' insomnia drawings. I don't feel like drawing right now. I feel like being asleep. Or having enough energy to not lose out on tomorrow. I don't want to take the low road

What about women are you passionate about Tereza? It's like when I read about artists' work with "identity". What does that mean, in more specific terms?

I have been watching Art:21 on DVD and have been very inspired. I feel like I responded in very positive ways to Roni Horn's work; been thinking about her for the last few days.

A Conscious Object piece is going to the BAM gala tonight. Very exciting stuff.

I started googling all the guys I slept with, starting with the one with whom I experienced "that trauma"...I became obsessed, and the names and faces I could remember have stayed with me this week.

I am terrified of my own power, and of transformation with a big "T". I feel way too much in my head, which gets alleviated when I work with my work, my body, my work.

Tomorrow/today I close on my construction loan for my building project: 1.275 million dollars to build my building. Did I ever think I'd even make that much in my lifetime, let alone taking out a loan for that amount? Maybe that's why I can't sleep. I gave Turu a one-hour reiki/myofascial/positional release session between 3 and 4AM because he couldn't sleep either.

I thoroughly cleaned my house before sitting down to write this.

I'll be in studio all day tomorrow before and after my closing; will post photos hopefully soon, to reclaim my body in my work. It sustains me to know Lorna Simpson is showing at the Whitney, and I'm 20 minutes away from the Metropolitan Museum.